Feets don't fail me now!

You know what is really funny later, but isn't so much at the time?  When you sit on the toilet for too long and your legs fall asleep.

I have encountered this problem a few times thanks to my smartphone's access to internet, games, texting, and whatnot.  

I wasn't feeling to well at work tonight so I was going through my checklist of things, have I eaten today? Have I had enough water?  Did I poop yet?   Well, I did eat some pizza that I am now regretting, but I did need some water, and then I decided to take that trip to the bathroom.

I knew I wasn't going to be done yet, but that feeling of dead weight in my legs began to sink in.  And then I started to panic.  Are my legs going to wake up in time to walk me out of here?  What if I fall?  That would be embarassing, and I don't remember the last time these stalls were mopped!?

So I said a prayer after I did my paperwork and slowly stood.  Okay good, they woke up.  Here we go to wash our hands.  By the time I made my way to the sink that ridiculous pins and needles feeling began to prickle and tickle my feet with every step.  And I thanked God that my older brother Matt wasn't around because the last time his leg fell asleep I started slapping it.  I could only imagine the pay back I would have received.

After a sufficient hand washing, I began to make my way down the hallway giggling.  Are you aware of how strange it is laughing like a small child by yourself in the middle of a 2000 square foot foyer?  Which made me laugh harder.  So not only was my body torturing itself by tickles, I had the giggles. 

Now back in my office with the normal feeling in my legs, I feel slightly better physically and mentally, I am probably crazy, because I am thinking, could you imagine this happening to the president?  The Pope?  Colin Powell?  And any other major figure.  Try not to laugh at the thought of that as they walk towards a group of people with that stiff leg, slow step into the public eye.

I Laugh in the Face of Children

I love my nieces and nephews dearly.  I think they offer great comedic relief at times when conversations with adults lack personality. conversations with kids just go better sometimes.

That is of course, unless you are talking to my 5 year old niece that happens to know everything and will gladly tell you so in an argument.

One particular day, my patience was wearing particulary thin with the child so I was doing my best to favor her three year old brother because that is just how i deal with children, I play them off one another.  

My nephew and I share a common interest in the show Fraggle Rock.  My favorite character is "The Great, and All Knowing,  Incredible Trash Hep. Meeeeehh"

The best part about the whole thing is the whiney "Meeeeehhh" by her introductors Phino and Grunge, the rats that discovered her and act as her lackeys.  So my nephew and I will randomly go up to each other and say "TRASH HEAP!" and the other will respond with a hearty "Meeeeeeeh"

So my niece, not one to miss an opportunity for redemption, runs up to me and goes, "Hey Julia! Uhhh....  uhmm..... uhhhhh......" and then she blankly stared at me and said "GARBAGE PILE!!! Ewwwwww."

And there we have it.  she committed fully to what she was saying and she looked like a buffoon.  and thats all I ask out of life.  To make sure that every5 yea r old has a moment to bring themselves off their pedestals and just see to it that they fail with confidence.  Because God knows all we need on this earth is a 5 year old that knows it all.